3 Ways To Stop Feeling Guilty
Let each bear his own guilt, and there will be no more guilty ones. Thomas Harris, whose brainchild is the terrifying character Hannibal Lecter, shared some wise words with us. He said, “The nature of our mistakes does not change by blaming yourself for these mistakes.” This makes you think about the usefulness of guilt and encourages you to think about how important it is not to blame yourself for everything. So how do you stop feeling guilty?
Being a perfectionist can turn out well, but you have to find a happy medium. Otherwise , guilt can turn this perfectionism into a punishment. You will always find something that could be better. In the long run, this will only make it possible for you to feel appreciation for your own work with great difficulty.
That’s why it’s important to work on your weaknesses without turning them into an obsession. When you get into this dangerous territory, you can be swallowed up by guilt and frustration.
How do you make sure you don’t feel guilty anymore?
Stop blaming yourself. The bad things that happen aren’t always because of you. You must learn to carefully assess the situation. Even if something is your fault, reminding yourself of this (or of your guilt) is a waste of your time.
If you don’t get out of the vicious circle of constant self-criticism, you can get into a downward spiral that’s hard to get out of. Psychologist Arturo Torres really gives a few handles that you can use to break the cycle. If you follow his advice, you can learn to stop feeling guilty.
If you can stop feeling guilty about everything, you will be able to face life with a positive, constructive attitude. That doesn’t mean you no longer need to be aware of the consequences of your actions. Also, of course, you shouldn’t ignore events around you.
The point is to take responsibility and deal with it in a constructive—that is, constructive—way. Look for solutions to the problem instead of just focusing on the problem itself. You should try to change your behavior and the way you relate to your environment.
Minimize the importance of guilt and shame
Feeling responsible for something bad that happens to you is normal. It just doesn’t mean you should feel guilty forever. Your guilt will probably stay with you for a while, but you don’t have to martyr yourself, don’t feel guilty anymore. The best thing you can do is see it as a teaching moment. Instead of punishing yourself, make sure you don’t make the same mistake again.
So learn from your mistake. You can then internalize this lesson—turn inward—and your guilt will subside. Keep blaming yourself is pointless. It makes no sense and is illogical. Instead, try to ask yourself what happened and what started it. Think about what you could have done better and what you could do next time.
Analyze your strengths and weaknesses
Nobody is perfect. It sounds corny, but it’s true. It is important that you know your own strengths and what you are good at. On the other hand, it is also important that you can identify your weaknesses. Familiarize yourself with these weaknesses so that you can foresee if something is more likely to fail.
Obviously you can’t do everything perfectly . That’s another cliché, but this one is also true. You will have to accept this reality — the sooner the better. If you can remember that and point out what you do well and what you do less well, you will know what is or was not your responsibility. This way you can recognize when you need to put more effort into something.
Imagine that you encounter a difficult obstacle somewhere in your life. If you are aware of this, you can avoid it. Or, if you can’t completely avoid it, you can at least evaluate your possible reactions to it. That said, if you don’t do this out of pride and stubbornness, you will still have to accept responsibility for your inaction.
Stop blaming yourself by observing yourself in others
People who walk around with a sense of guilt often belittle themselves around others. They often take the blame for things even though they had nothing to do with it. They lack assertiveness, so they behave submissively. This is a common dynamic in these types of relationships.
Looking back on past events is important. Take the time to think about each person involved and their responsibilities. Question accusations and don’t just accept them. It’s too easy to fall into the trap of self-criticism when you’re low on self-confidence. In this way, it also becomes easy for others to blame you for a lot of things.
Not feeling guilty about what you’ve talked yourself into can be achieved quite easily as long as you know the steps of the process. If you are able to analyze a certain situation, you can identify the problems and give a new twist to the situation. It’s not about punishing yourself for your mistakes. It’s about looking for alternatives and forging other paths so that you can continue to grow.
