When I Make Myself Feel, I Find My Strength
It’s in our nature to feel, and yet we keep building walls to hide our true selves. We don’t let ourselves feel our emotions, feelings, and experiences as they actually are. When we feel vulnerable and unprotected, we rely too much on our minds and pull away from our true self.
We’ve built up our strength since we were kids because we often feel like we don’t deserve love. In the face of fear and emotional pain, we have learned to isolate ourselves, adapting to a world that frightens us and that we believe is fraught with danger.
We have learned that when we show that we have weaknesses and problems, we can get hurt. When faced with broken relationships, disappointments, and disenchantment, we experience the pain and fear that comes with opening up to our experiences. But shutting down our emotions is not the answer.
What it means to avoid emotion
In building these walls, we learn a whole repertoire of strategies to hide who we are. We automatically learn to adapt to prevailing prejudices and stereotypes, to our environment. We believe there is a normal way to be and act, and we need to get as close to that as possible.
The belief that there is an appropriate way to behave is what keeps us from being who we really are. We are constantly fighting what we feel, what we want, what motivates us, what excites us. We spend a lot of energy not acknowledging our feelings.
We close ourselves off so much that we become insensitive to injustice and to the people we love and care for. We act automatically, out of obligation, completely losing the essence of our character, affection and kindness.
Make yourself feel
You’ve tried to avoid your feelings in many situations, right? You fought against yourself to become desensitized to something you didn’t want to experience. But avoiding pain is exactly what leads to permanent suffering.
While the greatest power we have in us, makes us feel and experience. We are afraid of letting this happen and getting stuck in this state or losing ourselves in it, running away as quickly as possible and trying to avoid experiencing our feelings.
Experiencing unpleasant things is necessary because it represents growth. Maturity and happiness are fueled by pain and sorrow. When we feel these things, we learn from the experience and appreciate even more everything that is pleasant and good for us.
Strength lies in vulnerability
Vulnerability is often confused with weakness. It means letting yourself feel what you need to feel, being honest and accepting that there are many things that can affect you, but that doesn’t mean you have a weak character.
By accepting your vulnerability, you open yourself to experiencing the feelings and emotions caused by interactions. It’s a natural state of being, so why hide behind a mask that prevents you from really seeing and makes you unhappy? It is your own decision to take off this mask. When you stop avoiding and suppressing your feelings, you can start being.
The only way to grow and get to know yourself is to show yourself with all your vulnerabilities. This takes a lot of courage, authenticity, maturity and strength. When you show yourself in such a natural way, you can get the same from your surroundings: sincere bonds based on love, not based on outward appearances.
