Sacrifices For Love: A Debilitating Behavior

When it comes to sacrifices for love, find reasonable ways to make them. Sacrificing yourself over and over in a relationship doesn’t make love stronger. It also doesn’t make everything more romantic. Actually, the opposite happens.

When we incessantly give up the things we want, it wears us out. It pushes us away from ourselves until we become something we are not.

In a loving relationship, commitment is more important than the sacrifices we make.

Self-confidence and personal limits

When someone goes over your limits, you have to make it clear that you don’t like that. If you don’t, chances are the other person will continue to push your boundaries.

After all, they will assume it doesn’t hurt you. The same applies to the bond you have with your partner. Everyone makes sacrifices for love now and then. It is quite normal and understandable.

However, no one can deny that all sacrifices have a price. Everything you have to give up hurts you. Planning that changes at the last minute is not something pleasant.

Any change you experience in your life that is due to another person is not easy. Change hurts. Sometimes it feels like a bar. However, you do it from your heart because you are committed to your partner.

However, the other person may not appreciate this or be unaware that you are making emotional and personal sacrifices for love. Then you are not on the right track. Confidence will slowly fade.

Eventually you will start complaining and blaming the other person. The ghosts of the sacrifices you’ve made will then haunt you even more. That’s because you will feel like you’ve lost a part of yourself that will never come back.

Moreover, endless disinterestedness in a relationship is not very healthy. Always giving in is a sad way to destroy one’s self-confidence. It is also a painful way to replace love.

Sacrifice for love: where do we draw the line?

People often say that great love, like great achievements, requires sacrifice. No one can deny this. If we were to ask this question to a few couples right now, many of them would be talking about more than one sacrifice they’ve made for each other.

Some had to change their lives completely. And it has worked for them without a doubt. Now they lead a happy life.

Yet many sacrifices for love are not acceptable. Still, many people also believe that the greater the sacrifice, the more sincere and romantic the relationship is. It is then as if love is an ancient deity that we have to worship.

You have to understand that not everything is justified or acceptable. When it comes to love, you really shouldn’t have to sacrifice anything. Sacrifices for love do not imply total selflessness. It also has nothing to do with forgetting your values, your identity and your self-confidence. So there are limits that you have to discover.

The willingness to sacrifice for love is better than constantly sacrificing yourself

Psychologists Caryl E. Rusbult, Paul AM Van Lange and others have conducted an interesting study. This study was published in the  Journal of Personality and Social Psychology  . They have shown that the willingness to sacrifice for love is one of the variables that most predicts commitment, stability and happiness in a relationship.

• A person does not need his partner to constantly make sacrifices. They just appreciate knowing that when the moment comes and something extraordinary happens, their partner will be willing to make a sacrifice for them.
• Knowing that we have their unconditional and absolute support in times of need is what makes us feel safe and content.

Sacrifices for love and emotional guilt

We all know that love involves commitment. In addition, we also know that in certain situations we have to make sacrifices so that the relationship lasts. We make those sacrifices confidently and freely. That’s because we know it helps the relationship grow.

In many cases, however, sacrifices for love become debt. Actually, there are people who like to use blackmail. They manipulate others by saying things like  “After all I’ve done for you, won’t you give in?”

Guilt is a very important aspect of all forms of sacrifice. We should not ignore this aspect because it can be dark. Some people see love in absolute terms. “I gave up everything for you. Now you owe me everything.” Those situations force us to sacrifice our own identity and turn a “me” into “us.”

In love there is no reason to put who we are aside. Nor is there any reason to put an end to what we value or what defines us. We can do many things for the person we love.

We even make some sacrifices for love. However, there are limits that should not be broken. By that we mean that we should not give in to blackmail or become someone we are not.