To Be Happy, We Must Leave Room For The Unexpected

It was Euripides who once said that what is expected rarely happens, because it is the unexpected that presents itself that can really change our lives.

However, leaving room for the unexpected requires a receptive heart and an open mind. Because only then will we be able to seize the wonderful opportunities that arise.

Something sociologists or even economic researchers often tell us, including noted essayist Nassim Nicholas Taleb, is that we pretend we can predict what will happen tomorrow, yesterday, and even next week.

Our ignorance, or rather our exaggerated need to think we have everything under control, often causes us to not know how to react when something suddenly happens that we did not expect.

This behavior or basic need is explained by a very simple principle: our brain must feel that everything is under control. It doesn’t care if we’re not happy; it just wants us to ‘survive’.

So your brain will interpret anything even slightly unexpected as a threat. Like the echo of a battalion marching under the banner of danger.

In fact, people who hide most of the fears, insecurities, and emptiness often develop a greater need for control over themselves and others.

Any controlling person is inevitably doomed to the abyss of discontent and unhappiness. That’s what happens when you try to control the uncontrollable and leave no room for the unexpected.

Learn from children: great lovers of the unexpected

If you want to get a baby’s attention, show him something unexpected. His eyes are just drawn to it. Babies love the extraordinary, bright colors and enigmatic things.

They have a natural and instinctive ability to embrace the unpredictable and amazing things in their environment. However, with our mature, rational lenses, we have lost this capacity. This is such a shame as we could have learned a lot from it.

In fact, as explained by a study at Johns Hopkins University by psychologist Aimée Stahl, babies between the ages of nine and 11 months tend to react more strongly to stimuli that seem to defy logic.

To demonstrate this, a remarkable experiment was done with a group of babies. Two types of toys were presented: one that seemed to go through the walls (an optical illusion) and another that simply bumped into them.

Interestingly, the babies were more interested in the kind that seemed to be doing something impossible: going through the wall. Experts concluded from these tests that younger children are programmed to fixate on the unexpected.

However, as we grow, the unexpected is often interpreted as something beyond our control and which, as a result, can be dangerous…

Save a spot for the unexpected in your life

Do it – leave the door of your heart open so that from time to time a new, joyful, and impetuous breeze may enter. It really can’t hurt.

Give yourself a small space in your life for the unpredictable. Things that are not on your agenda and have nothing to do with your goals can be good for you.

Because the realm of the unexpected may be much better than we ever thought. Great explorers have discovered whole continents by chance. Coincidences have given us some of history’s greatest moments.

Maybe you don’t like your job, but you made a good friend there who got you started on a hobby that you now love. Perhaps this hobby is so emotionally and intellectually appealing that you will make it your new career. Then you set up your company and meet the love of your life there.

One thing can lead to another. We jump from stone to stone in this unstoppable river of life, almost without realizing it.

But to appreciate the beauty and opportunity in every step, we must be open to the magic of every day. And we must have a positive attitude, because anyone who expects the unexpected with a receptive mind opens themselves to opportunities for happiness.