Traits Of Controlling And Possessive Men

There are a number of traits and attitudes that controlling and possessive men have in common. Of course, we must not forget that these men can also be very different individuals.

They may have different social and economic statuses, ages, educations, religious beliefs, political tendencies and upbringings.

In addition to the properties we describe in this article, they may also have other things in common. Almost all controlling and possessive men enter into a relationship based on dominant and authoritarian behavior.

They may hide their behavior through subtle, friendly gestures, or they may act without thinking. The point is that little by little they build a cage into which they eventually lure their partners.

The first warning signs are the negative comments and rejection towards the partner disguised as false modesty. Also, these types of men will question their partner about every detail of their daily life.

The problem is that little by little the victims are starting to lose their identity. The victims downplay any behavior that causes distress and pain and begin to think about anything they say just to please their partner.

Determining the boundary

At the beginning of a relationship, it can be normal for someone to ask their partner what she did that day. It can also still be normal to send several messages in one day or to call a few times. However, where is the limit?

It becomes dangerous when the person’s desire to know everything becomes an obsession and when interest turns into control. The problem is that these guys usually don’t show their possessiveness and urge for control at the beginning of a relationship. However, as time goes by, these tendencies increasingly surface.

While both men and women can have these tendencies, in this article we focus on the traits and characteristics of controlling and possessive men .

obsessive personality

Controlling and possessive men are characterized by obsessive personalities. They want to know everything and always seem to be on the defensive. They get angry easily, although they sometimes try to keep their aggression in check.

The obsession with checking where their partner is at all times of the day, who she talks to, or what friendships she has becomes the main focus of the relationship. Even though she’s constantly letting him know where she is, who she’s with, and what she’s doing, he’ll always check her story to make sure.

He will always look for a way to confirm that what his partner is telling him is true.

It is important to remember that we are all free. No one has the right to decide for us who we can or cannot associate with or what we can or cannot wear. If someone does try this, they treat us with disrespect. Moreover, he limits our freedom.

Controlling and possessive men are jealous

Jealousy is a sign of insecurity that we focus on our partner. So it comes up when someone feels threatened and fears that his partner doesn’t love him anymore.

The person is afraid that he is no longer the center of attention of his loved one, even though this may be far from true. In other words, he is afraid of being abandoned. He is also emotionally dependent and very insecure.

Most people are able to put these feelings into context. However, controlling and possessive men often find it very difficult to deal with these kinds of feelings. Because of this, jealousy often wins. They then express themselves through critical, controlling, and even aggressive behavior.

Control over social networks and other devices

Controlling and possessive men not only tend to call or text several times a day, they also get angry if their partner doesn’t answer right away.

If things like this happen right at the beginning of your relationship, it’s a good idea to talk about it with your partner. If he still does not understand after that, we advise you to end the relationship.

However, if you are in a stable relationship and your partner suddenly starts exhibiting this type of behavior, we recommend that you discuss it or consult an expert.

You should know that your cell phone is a very personal item. No one should actually be checking your calls or messages. You have a right to privacy.

Possession

Living with a controlling or possessive man is practically impossible. These types of men oppress their  partner and expect her to submit to him.

In addition, their possessiveness towards their partner is very strong. This means that they consider their partner as their own and want to determine for her without regard for what she wants.

This can lead to situations of psychological abuse. It can then even be difficult for the victim to view reality objectively. Then there is self-deception.

In these cases it is important to turn off the idea of ​​’belonging’ in love. In addition, we need to erase from our minds the idea that jealousy is a sign of love.

Love and possessiveness or need for control do not mix. Love is all about freedom, respect and trust. It is therefore important to establish certain boundaries in a relationship.

They demand that you change your taste and way of being

In general, possessive and controlling men convince their partner to let go of her hobbies, interests and friendships . They don’t want their partner to have interests that they have no control over.

In extreme cases , they can even become verbally or physically violent. They want the other person to behave exactly as they want and for her to do everything they expect and demand of her. In these kinds of situations, it is extremely important that the woman seeks professional and legal help as soon as possible.

In short, we must remember that love, respect and the desire to grow your partner are the most important things in a relationship.