Why Do You Have To Love Yourself?
How many times have you heard that it’s important to love yourself? The fact is that by loving yourself you are also able to love others. At least that’s what they say. What do you think?
If loving yourself is so great, why do we always choose to do just the opposite? Who chooses not to love themselves? In this article we answer both questions.
I choose not to love myself
You may never have experienced this, but often times in a negative situation or moment we tend to act in the opposite way than we should. Why do we do that? Do we enjoy suffering and being in pain?
Simply put, this is a “masochistic” way of coping with the things that hurt us and is our attempt to have some control over the pain.
If you choose not to love yourself, you may be doing this because it is easier for you to let others think for you. You think other people are important, but you are not. Do you know where these thoughts come from?
1. Apologies
You have a thousand and one reasons why you shouldn’t be loved: you don’t deserve it, you’re not important, you’re always the problem etc. These kinds of excuses and many more keep you from loving and hindering yourself others to love you too. As a result, you slowly sink into a state of unhappiness.
2. Avoiding Risks
At first it may seem positive to avoid risk, but the opposite is true! Building friendships or avoiding a relationship because you want to avoid the risk of being rejected doesn’t count as a positive thing. Taking risks is part of life. What if this opportunity turns out well? What if it actually makes you happy?
3. Not moving forward
Getting stuck, always staying at the same point, because you fear that everything will change – this is a fear that many people experience. Step out of your comfort zone! You may feel safe, but you are not moving forward at all. We are destined to find more, to move forward. If there is no progress, our lives are of less use. How can anyone be happy with a useless life?
4. Being a Victim
Not only do you not love yourself, but you also enjoy it when other people feel sorry for you. Do you feel better about seeing yourself as a victim? Behind all that pain you are trying to feel is a hidden frustration and an important fear. Instead of hiding in the hurtful words of others and living on it, try to change! There are other ways out, so don’t close yourself off and keep moving forward!
5. Self-pity
After you have deliberately chosen not to love yourself, you also feel sorry for yourself! This serves as an escape route, but how long can it go on like this? The change, the thought of being different, is frightening to you.
You have to learn to face that fear somehow. Don’t try to hide yourself anymore! Don’t look for a way to escape; turn around and face that which you are running from. Now is the time.
6. Complain and protest
You turn into a person who is constantly complaining about everything and going against everything. This is interesting because you never even take steps to resolve those situations that you are complaining about. This seems ironic, don’t you think? What are you waiting for?
7. Trying to be a Brave
You go back in time with the goal of turning into that good guy all the adults around you used to want you to be. But perfection does not exist; we all make mistakes all the time, so it’s completely futile to strive to be perfect. When you do this, you don’t grow up, you become more childish. Is that really what you want?
8. Not living your own life
Who will lead your life if you don’t do it yourself? Since you feel that you are not worthy to be happy, you are also incapable of taking the reins of your own life into your own hands. You don’t know how to live your life or how to handle it. What are you waiting for? Start living your life.
9. Putting Others First
You always feel like other people are more important than you. This will make your life the property of others. What about having your own life? Aren’t you curious what that would be like?
If you realize after reading this article that you don’t love yourself, put an end to this. Solve the problem! There is nothing good in it at all, only frustration, sadness and intense unhappiness. Your life is exclusively yours. Grab it with both hands and enjoy it to the fullest. After all, you only have one life. Which choice will you make?
